bisexual and pansexual identities exploring and challenging invisibility and invalidation

It’s when others don’t view bisexuality as a valid, unique, and legitimate sexual orientation. Am I being gay enough? Am I being straight enough? All I am is 100 per cent bisexual.īiphobia has been prevalent globally for decades and was defined in 1992 by Bennett as prejudice experienced by bisexuals from straight and gay individuals. All this comes together to form a mess of internalised biphobia. When I do, I am actively objectified, and my sexuality is painted negatively (Glee, Sex and the City, Insatiable, The Real O'Neals).

I sometimes feel that around every corner, people erase my existence. Recently, in the park with a friend, we overheard a conversation along the lines of ‘if you date girls, you’re a lesbian and nothing else’. I remember instances of being asked, ‘are you attracted to anyone in this room?’ – the stereotype about bisexuality being that I am automatically attracted to everyone. In both moments, the event and the call out, I felt a depth of discomfort that I haven't felt in years, possibly ever. I ended up calling out my GSA, most of whom were friends. To them, it was just a joke, but to me, it was painful and upsetting, although I couldn't quite put my finger on why. At the time, I didn't realise that what had been said was an act of bisexual erasure – I knew nothing about it. At the time, I had a boyfriend, and my friends asked me: ‘So Tom, now that you have a boyfriend, does that mean you’re gay now?’. I was part of a GSA (Gay-Straight Alliance), and many of my friends were members. I was in college when I experienced bisexual erasure for the first time.

Bisexual and pansexual identities exploring and challenging invisibility and invalidation